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"Men" Section (jokes 1 to 4)
Jose lived in San Juan, and all he ever wanted was to see a baseball game in Yankee Stadium. Jose loved baseball, he loved the Yankees. He worked and saved and at long last bought a ticket, took a plane, but when he got to Yankee Stadium, it was all sold out. Not a seat to be had. Jose pleaded, touched the heart of the ticket office and they found him a seat way out in the bleachers behind the flagpole. Jose saw his baseball game and went back to Puerto Rico, flying so high he almost didn't need a plane. "Well, Jose," they asked when he returned, "how was it?" Jose raved. The Stadium, the game, the Yankees ... And most of all the fans, so friendly, so concerned about him that before the game they all stood up and turned to him and sang, "Jose? Can you see?" (1)
(samsi)
A middle-aged guy is out to dinner with his wife to celebrate her fortieth birthday. He says, "So what would you like, Julie? A Jaguar? A sable coat? A diamond necklace?" She says, "Bernie, I want a divorce." "My goodness," he says, "I wasn't planning on spending that much." (2)
(samsi)
An office manager arrives at his department and sees an employee sitting behind his desk, totally stressed out. He gives him the advice: "I went home every afternoon for two weeks and had myself pampered by my wife. It was fantastic, and it really helped; you should try it too!". Two weeks later, when the manager arrives at his department, he sees the man happy and full of energy at his desk. The faxes are piling up, and the computer is running at full speed. "I see you followed my advice". "I did", answers the employee. "It was great! By the way I didn't know you had such a nice house!". (3)
(samsi)
An old man goes into the confessional and says to the priest, "Father, I'm 80 years old, married, have four kids and 11 grandchildren, and last night I had an affair with two 18 year old girls. I made love with both of them twice." The priest said: "Well, my son, when was the last time you were in confession?" "Never Father, I'm Jewish," the man replied. "So then, why are you telling me?", the priest asked. "Telling you?", the man cried. "I'm telling everybody!" (4)
(samsi)
Page 1 of "Men" Section